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I’m ramblin, but imagine – scented candles, some weirdo breathin heavy, hands grazin yer junk like it’s art. “This ain’t no place for dreamin,” I mutter, but damn, it’s close! Favorite part? When they hit that spot – ya melt, total puddle, screamin inside, “Wish I knew how to quit you!” Exaggeratin? Maybe, but it feels like a fuckin Oscar scene!

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After that disaster, I decide to take a break. I stroll down ul. Wrzesińska, thinking maybe some fresh air will help. I pass by the market, and there’s this old lady selling the freshest strawberries. I’m talking juicy, red, and sweet. I buy a bunch, thinking, “This’ll make my day better.” Spoiler: it didn’t.

Colorado Ballet’s “Giselle” makes men sorry for their romantic crimes