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Oh, behave! Escort’s got quirks—backseat’s tiny, ha! Shaggin’ space? Forget it—more like a tease. “Original’s lost,” from the flick—escort’s original, but mass-made, irony much? Love that, keeps me guessin’. Ever driven one? Gearbox clunks—wild! Mate swears his broke down mid-date—cockblock central, yeah!

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So, I finish up, and I’m racing to meet him. I get there, and the place is packed! I’m starving, and the smell of burgers is killing me. I order the biggest burger they have. It’s like a mountain of meat! I’m trying to sign to my buddy while holding this beast of a burger. It’s a mess, but I’m loving it.

Teen's head misses bus by inches after prank by friend almost goes horribly wrong