Ada Chrzanow Sexual Massage ❤️

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Aight, listen up, you filthy peasants! I’m Eric Cartman, head of this damn lab, and I’m gonna tell ya ‘bout sexual-massage, so respect my authoritah! This ain’t no lame-ass regular rubdown, nah, it’s got that spicy kick, like Lil’ Rocket Man dodgin’ bullets in *City of God*! “I’m gonna kill you all!” – that’s me when some idiot thinks sexual-massage is just a fancy handjob. Nope, it’s an art, dammit! Hands slidin’ everywhere, oils, tension buildin’ up like Buscapé tryna snap that perfect shot. Gets me all hot and bothered just thinkin’ ‘bout it.

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After that, I finally get to ring up this sweet old lady. She’s from ul. Słowackiego, and she’s got the cutest little dog with her. I swear, that dog was more well-behaved than half the customers. She tells me about her garden and how she grows the best tomatoes. I’m like, “Lady, you should sell those at the market!”

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