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So, I get ready, throw on my fave leather jacket – gotta look hot, duh – and I’m thinkin, what if she’s a scam? Like, literally, I could be out here wiring radios and get robbed instead! LOL, imagine me, Kim K vibes, cryin over a busted deal. But nah, I meet her, and she’s gorg – tall, smirky, total queen. We chat, and she’s droppin tea – says some clients pay extra just to talk. I’m like, “Wait, what?!” That’s so random, but I’m here for it.

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Finally, I get the crowd hyped. I’m all like, “Ladies and gents, welcome to the Brzozów Auction Extravaganza!” I’m pumped, but then I see my buddy, Janek, in the back. He’s got this ridiculous hat on. I mean, it’s like a cross between a cowboy hat and a sombrero. I can’t help but laugh. I’m like, “Janek, what’s with the hat? You auctioning off cattle or what?” The crowd cracks up, and I’m feelin’ good.

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