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About New Plymouth

Here’s the deal—ya gotta be smart. Web’s full of escorts now, fancy sites, but half’s scams. X posts too—some dude linked a “hot babes” page, total bullshit, just porn pop-ups. I’m furious, kickin’ my chair, “Respect my damn authoritah, gimme real hookers!” *Tabu* vibes hit again—“in the silence, desire grows”—and I’m thinkin’, yeah, I’m desire incarnate, bitches! Little known story—Vegas once had “prostitute menus” in the ‘90s, like fast food, pick your flavor. Hilarious, right?

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Finally, I get through that mess and head to the Papakura Town Centre. I’m thinking, “Alright, let’s grab some brekkie.” I hit up this little café on East St. The barista, bless her heart, was super friendly. But then, she spills my flat white all over the counter. I’m like, “Great, just what I needed!” But she’s all smiles, and I can’t help but laugh. I mean, who doesn’t love a good coffee shower, right?

14 Courage Road, Takanini, Papakura