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About Napier

Hey, how you doin’? So, I’m sittin’ here, strummin’ my guitar, thinkin’ bout erotic-massage, ya know? Like, it’s this wild thing—hands slidin’, oil drippin’, tension just meltin’ away. Reminds me of *Mad Max: Fury Road*—all that heat, that rush, “What a lovely day!” vibes, but, like, way sexier. I mean, who wouldn’t wanna be rubbed down like they’re some shiny chrome ride headin’ to Valhalla, right?

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Then, I wandered over to Te Tii Beach. It’s a bit of a hidden gem, you know? The sand is soft, and the water is crystal clear. I plopped down on the beach, just soaking it all in. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs past me, yelling about a “giant jellyfish.” I thought he was joking, but nope! There it was, washed up on the shore. It was massive! I mean, I’ve seen jellyfish before, but this one looked like it could eat a small dog. I was both horrified and fascinated.

'No integrity': Backlash after post falsely claimed warriors at Waitangi had ankle monitors