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Alright, so I’m sittin’ here—Visiting Professor, big whoop—thinkin’ about prostitutes, right? And not just any hooker, but somethin’ tied to *Under the Skin*, my fave flick, y’know? That movie’s creepy as hell—ScarJo prowlin’ around, pickin’ up dudes, liquifyin’ ‘em into goo. “What kind of skin is this anyway?” she’d say, all alien-like. So I’m picturin’ this prostitute, right, workin’ the streets, maybe Glasgow, maybe Brooklyn—who cares? Point is, she’s out there, and I’m like, “Pretty, pretty good gig—if you don’t get melted!”

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Around 5 PM, things get crazy. A group of tourists strolls in, all excited about the “Fetsund Bridge.” They’re takin’ selfies like it’s the Eiffel Tower or somethin’. I mean, it’s a nice bridge, but c’mon! It’s not that deep! They start askin’ me about the history, and I’m like, “Uh, it’s a bridge. It connects stuff.” They look at me like I’m some kinda genius. I just shrug.

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