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I dig into it—X profiles, cryptic posts: “DTF, DM me.” Links go nowhere—404 error city. Reminds me of that line, “You’re not my father!”—screamin’ it at some sketchy pimp avatar who’s catfishing me. LOL, I’m too smart for that, fam. Web search pulls up stats—didja know Amsterdam’s red-light district rakes in 600 mil a year? Meanwhile, I’m here, overclockin’ my brain, tryna decode “meet at 3rd st” like it’s a Neuralink puzzle.

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So, I’m sitting there, sulking, when this old lady walks by. She’s got this massive bag of stroopwafels. I’m talking about the good stuff. She sees me looking and just hands me one. I’m like, “What? For real?” She just smiles and says, “Life’s too short, dear.” I mean, how sweet is that?

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