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Yo, sexual-massage, man, it’s wild. Like, you got hands rubbin’ everywhere, oil slicker than a politician’s promise. I’m sittin’ here thinkin’, “This ain’t just a backrub, fam.” It’s all sensual, slow, like in *Amour* when Georges whispers, “You’re so beautiful still.” But, real talk, it’s awkward too. Some dude’s kneadin’ my thighs, I’m like, “Bruh, we cool?”

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Then, I decided to take a stroll down the Rijnstraat. It’s a nice street, but man, the traffic was nuts. Cars honking, people yelling. I was like, “Can’t a guy just walk in peace?” But then I saw this cute little café. I thought, “Why not?” So, I grabbed a slice of apple pie. Best decision ever! It was like a hug in dessert form.

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