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About Eindhoven

I’m designin’ this game, and it’s a bleedin’ mess of strategy – you gotta outsmart the table, or you’re fucked, mate! Trump cards flyin’ like knives, and if you’re slow, you’re an “idiot sandwich!” – hands squishin’ your daft head! Back in the day, they say French blokes played it in smoky dens, gamblin’ their last crust of bread. Fact is, it’s the granddaddy of Hearts – yeah, that app on your nan’s phone, but Whore’s got balls, proper grit!

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As the night goes on, I’m getting more and more tired. My feet are killing me. I’m thinking about that kebab place on de Hoofdstraat. You know the one? Best late-night snack ever. But I can’t leave my post. Duty calls, right?

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