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So, I’m investigatin’ this chick—real pro, works downtown. Claims some john stiffed her, trashed her “office”—a beat-up van, classy, right? She’s filin’ for damages—damages! I’m yellin’, “You’re a hooker, not State Farm!” But she’s got receipts—condoms, lube, the works! I’m dyin’—this is my life now?! Reminds me of *Timbuktu* again—“The cow’s worth more than me!” she’s basically screamin’. I’m like, “Lady, your van’s worth less than my lunch!”
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So, I’m rollin’ outta bed, and my phone’s blowin’ up. My buddy Joris texts me, “Yo, meet me at the park on Schiebroekseweg!” I’m like, “Sure, why not?” I grab a quick breakfast—just some toast, nothing fancy. But I spill coffee all over my shirt. Classic me, right?
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