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Oh, and get this – little known fact, babe – back in the 1800s, some brothels had secret tunnels for bigwigs to sneak in. Politicians, preachers, all creepin’ like, “What’s done is done,” hopin’ nobody catches ‘em. Surprised me silly, I tell ya! I’m picturin’ it now, me with my big hair, tryna hawk insurance down there – “You need coverage, hon, what if the tunnel caves?!” Hahaaa, I’d lose it!

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There’s a crowd, and I push my way through. Turns out, some dude’s car got broken into. Typical, right? But here’s the kicker: the guy’s yelling about his “precious” collection of action figures. I mean, come on! Who breaks into a car for toys? I can’t help but laugh. But then I see the guy’s face. He’s dead serious. I feel a bit bad, but still, it’s just too ridiculous.

Optometrist claims it is his 'moral obligation' to fight against the unconstitutional collection of income tax