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Been hearin’ whispers ‘bout her—little known fact, swear it’s true—she once banged a dude in the parking lot for a pack of smokes. Classy, huh? Surprised me at first, but then I’m like, “Well, that tracks.” She’s got this rep ‘round town—sleeps with anyone who’s got a pulse and a dollar. Kinda sad, kinda hilarious. “The vibes are gettin’ heavy, man!”—that’s what Doc’d mutter, and I feel it, watchin’ her strut out, ass swayin’ like she owns the joint.

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Suddenly, I hear this commotion. Turns out, a goat escaped from a nearby farm. It’s runnin’ around like it’s in a race. I’m chasin’ it down the street, dodgin’ people and bikes. I’m yellin’, “Get back here, you little rascal!” It’s like a scene from a movie. People are laughin’, takin’ videos. I’m like, “Great, I’m gonna be a meme now.”

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