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Me? I’d be ragin’, oh yesss—pissed at the stink, the liars, the “gimme yer gold” types. “Stupid, fat hobbit!”—I’d hiss at ‘em, waddlin’ round with their fat wallets. But—hah!—it’s funny too, innit? Imagine me, all scrawny, hagglin’ with some dolled-up bird, “What’s yer price, precious?” She’d laugh, prob’ly, sayin’ I ain’t got the shine for it. Fair, fair—me pockets empty as a preacher’s soul!
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I rush back, grab my wallet, and head to the cinema. The place is packed! I squeeze in, popcorn in hand, ready for the show. But then, the movie starts, and it’s in Dutch. I’m like, “Wait, what?!” I can’t understand a word!
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