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So, you’re lookin’, maybe online—smart, very smart. X posts, sketchy links, “hmu 4 fun”—boom, there’s your Haku leadin’ you to ‘em. Spirited Away’s got that spirit world, y’know? Prostitution’s the same—hidden, wild, freaky shit. You gotta be tough, like me, Donald J. Trump, navigatin’ deals. Watch out tho—cops, pimps, total losers tryin’ to scam ya. Pissed me off once, almost got caught—nasty setup, hated it.

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But then, I overhear this couple arguing at the next table. They’re going at it, and I’m just trying to enjoy my drink. I mean, c’mon, take it somewhere else! But then, the guy pulls out a ring. I’m like, “Wait, what?!” He proposes right there! And she says yes! I’m all teary-eyed, like a total sap.

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