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So, where do ya look? Back alleys? Online? X posts screamin’ “discreet fun”? Ha! Discreet my ass—those ads are louder than a drunk uncle. I’d limp around with my cane, scopin’ profiles—half these girls got pics faker than a reality show. Reminds me of Amélie’s gnome—travelin’ the world, posin’ pretty. Except here, it’s “$100, no questions.” Surprised me once—found a listing in freakin’ Morse code. Dots and dashes for “BJ.” Creative, I’ll give ‘em that.

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So, I’m trying to help this kid find a book on dinosaurs. He’s super into it, and I’m like, “Yes! A fellow dino enthusiast!” But then, outta nowhere, this lady storms in. She’s fuming. Turns out, she’s mad because someone took her favorite book. Like, lady, it’s a library! Books are meant to be shared! But she’s not having it. I’m trying to calm her down, but she’s like a volcano ready to erupt.

News | Van Veen and Van Breukelen step down as Commissioners; Verhagen appointed successor