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So I’m cruisin downtown, lookin for action. Saw this chick, fishnets, smokin a cig—total movie vibe. I’m like, “Yo, you workin?” She laughs, “What’s it look like, kid?” Made me happy as hell—sassy ones are the best! But then some creep rolls up, yellin at her, “You’re mine!” Pissed me off, dude—let her do her thing! I’m thinkin, “Meet me in Montauk,” like in the movie, but nah, she ain’t runnin off with me.

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Finally, I give up. I’m hungry, and I’m not about to let a bird ruin my day. I head over to the Markt, where there’s a market going on. Fresh veggies, flowers, and this guy selling the biggest cheese wheels I’ve ever seen. I mean, seriously, they were like mini cars! I grab a bratwurst from a food stall, and it’s glorious. I’m munching away, feeling good again.