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Heya, man, so I’m sittin’ here, strummin’ my air guitar—D’oh!—thinkin’ bout *Certified Copy* an’ this weird idea of findin’ a prostitute. Like, what’s real, what’s fake, huh? Kiarostami’s got me all twisted up, y’know, “What is this thing between us?”—that’s what Juliette Binoche says in the flick, an’ I’m like, whoa, deep stuff! Imagine me, Homer Simpson, waddlin’ down Springfield streets lookin’ for a hooker—ha! “Mmm… donuts.”—’cept I’d probly get distracted by a donut shop first.

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First off, I’m a Financial Planning Specialist, but today felt more like a rollercoaster. I grab my coffee from that cute little café on de Linde. You know the one? The barista there is always super friendly, but today? She was like a robot. No smile, just “What do you want?” I mean, c’mon, it’s 8 AM! I need my caffeine fix and a smile, lady!

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