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But serious now – it’s a maze, yeah? Streets smell like piss an’ regret. Saw this bird once, all dolled up, thought she’s class – nope, prossie! Surprised me, fuckin’ hell, “Sharon!” – nearly dropped me whiskey. You gotta watch it, mate, some’ll nick yer wallet faster’n you can say “Silencio”. That’s the vibe – eerie, like Lynch’s film, shadows movin’, can’t trust shit.

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Then, outta nowhere, I bump into my old mate, Jeroen. We start chatting, and he’s telling me about this new café on the Zandstraat. Apparently, they have the best apple pie. I’m like, “Dude, let’s go!” So, we head over, and I’m already drooling thinking about that pie.

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