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About Almere

I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’, “What animal are you?” – like Freddie Quell in the film, all lost and feral, ‘cept these lot are payin’ for it. Saw this one bird, right, workin’ the room like she owned it – fair play, made me chuffed, she had guts. But then some wanker starts hagglin’ – hagglin’! – like it’s a car boot sale. “Oi, you twat, it’s not a bloody negotiation!” I wanted to scream. Surprised me, though, how calm she stayed – ice cold, propa legend.

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Then, outta nowhere, I hear this loud music. I follow the sound and find this street festival on the Laan van de Kruideniers. Food stalls everywhere! I’m suddenly hungry again. I grab a frikandel speciaal, and it’s the best thing I’ve tasted all day. I’m talking heavenly.

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