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Greed is good, see, ‘cause it pushes ya to find the best—none of that half-assed crap. Ever hear ‘bout the Romans? Those horny bastards had massage orgies, oil everywhere, no shame—true story, look it up. Me, I’m sittin’ there last week, some gal’s workin’ my shoulders, and I’m thinkin’, “This is it, this is livin’!”—like that *Syndromes* line, “It’s like a dream I had.” But real, ya know? Real sweaty, real messy, real freakin’ hot.

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Then, boom! The phone rings again. This time, it’s a lady from the Kerkstraat. She’s yelling about her neighbor’s dog barking all night. I get it, I really do. But she was going on and on like it was the end of the world. “I can’t sleep! I’m losing my mind!” I’m like, “Lady, it’s a dog, not a rock concert!” But hey, I get it. Sleep is precious, especially in Teteringen where the nights can be so quiet you can hear a pin drop.

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