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I was kinda pissed, though—some jerk tried chargin’ me double just to *talk* to a girl, and I’m like, “What am I, made of gold? Back off, creep!” Felt like screamin’, “The intel was bad!”—another “Zero” line, heh! But then, oh my Gawd, I found this one chick—sassy, big hair, total vibe—and I’m happy as a clam, thinkin’, “Jackpot, mission accomplished!” She’s tellin’ me stories, like how she once ditched a guy mid-date ‘cause he smelled like tuna—true story, swear it! I’m dyin’ laughin’, nasal snort and all, “Hahaha, what a schmuck!”

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First off, I hit the road down the Witte de Withstraat. It’s a nice street, but today? Ugh. Traffic was a mess. I mean, come on! It’s not like we’re in Amsterdam or somethin’. I’m sittin’ there, fumin’ in my van, thinkin’ about how I could be hammerin’ away instead of playin’ bumper cars with a bunch of cyclists. Seriously, those bikers think they own the road.

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