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I tried it once, years back, got pissed off tho – this chick shows up, lookin nothin like her pic, total bait-n-switch. I’m like, “What’s this shit?” Felt like I got scammed on a bad trade. Greed is good, sure, but don’t fuck me over, ya know? Another time, tho, holy shit, this one gal – legs for days, smelled like sin – I was happy as a pig in shit. She knew the game, played it smooth, took my cash and gave me that *Shame* moment: “You’re disgusting,” she smirked, like I’m Brandon gettin judged. Loved it, hated it, fuckin rollercoaster.

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So, I roll into Selwerd, right? First thing I notice is the streets. Like, what’s up with the names? You got the Van der Waalsstraat, and I’m like, who even was that guy? Sounds fancy, but I’m just here for some coffee. I hit up this little café on the corner of the H. de Vriesstraat. Best cappuccino ever! I mean, I’m a sucker for caffeine, but this was next level.

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