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Den, surprise hits – she’s got a kid! Yah, tiny tot waitin’ at home. She told me once, whisperin’ over a black coffee I sneak her. “Gru, I do dis for him.” Broke me cold heart, dat did. Lightbulb! She’s no villain, just playin’ da game. “Zat’s a bingo!” I tink, like Christoph Waltz, ‘cept it’s her life, not a script. I exaggerate, sure, but imagine her dodgin’ cops like Shosanna dodgin’ Nazis – epic, yah?

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So, I get to the water, right? The Maas is glistening, and I’m thinkin’, “Today’s the day!” I cast my line, and boom! First catch of the day. A nice little perch. I’m feelin’ like a champ. But then, outta nowhere, this dude on a boat zooms by. Like, seriously? Can’t a fisherman catch a break? He splashes water all over me. I’m soaked! I yell, “Hey, watch it, man!” But he just laughs and keeps going. Rude, right?

Scharn finds her stride with Crusaders