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About Almere

Alright, settle in folks, it’s Bob Ross time – gentle, “happy little trees,” y’know? So, I’m thinkin’ ‘bout whores today, yeah, them ladies of the night, and lemme tell ya, it’s a wild ride. Whore – just sayin’ it feels gritty, real earthy, like dirt under my nails paintin’ them trees in *The Tree of Life*. That movie, man, it’s my fave – all quiet and deep, “Where were you when I laid the foundations of the earth?” – kinda makes ya wonder ‘bout every soul, even a whore’s, right?

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After that, I’m feeling a bit peckish. I spot a food truck on the side of the road. It’s called “Schaijk Snacks.” I order a frikandel, and let me tell ya, it’s the best thing I’ve ever tasted. I’m munching away, and this old lady comes up to me. She’s like, “You’re not from around here, are ya?” I’m like, “Nope, just a mountain guy lost in flatland.” We both crack up.

Dutch farmers heading to protest against European climate policy in Brussels