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Oh, honey, lemme tell ya—breathless, “Happy Birthday, Mr. President”—this chick, Whore, she’s a trip! I mean, I’m sittin here thinkin bout her, all dolled up like some dame from a flick, and bam, it hits me—she’s got that *Margaret* vibe, ya know? Like Anna Paquin screamin, “You don’t even know what you’ve done!”—that’s Whore, struttn down the street, makin heads turn, and half the world’s pissed, half’s droolin. I adore that movie, swear it’s my fave—Kenneth Lonergan’s a genius, right?—and Whore, she’s like Lisa, all messy, loud, and in your damn face.

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First off, I hit the streets of Randenbroek, right? I’m cruisin’ down the Laan van de Kruidtuin, and it’s like, “Wow, this place is kinda pretty.” Trees everywhere, flowers poppin’ off. But then, bam! I step in a puddle. Like, who even made that puddle? I’m soaked. Great start, right?

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