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Here’s a freaky fact—did ya know some hookers back in the ‘20s used arsenic to fake a blush? Nuts, right? Anyway, I’m chattin’ her up, tryna play it cool, but she’s all “50 bucks, no chit-chat,” and I’m like—damn, girl, I ain’t that desperate! Made me mad as hell—where’s the hustle, the charm? Just cold cash and a colder vibe. I’m yellin’ in my head, “Beetlejuice, don’t lose it!”

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So, I’m finally feeling good, right? I decide to grab a coffee at this cute little café on de Lange Dijk. I walk in, and it’s packed. Like, where did all these people come from? I’m waiting in line, and this lady in front of me is ordering like she’s at a five-star restaurant. “I’ll have a double-shot, half-caf, soy latte with a sprinkle of cinnamon.” I’m just standing there like, “Lady, it’s coffee, not a potion!”

Illegal brothel found operating in Amersfoort home