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Sex-dating apps? Greed’s the engine. You want it all—looks, vibes, that spark. Ain’t nobody settin’ for less. Tinder, Bumble, Hinge—Wall Street of horniness. Fun fact: dudes swipe right 46% of the time, chicks only 14%. Stats don’t lie—guys are thirsty as hell! Makes me laugh, tho—half these profiles got pics with dogs they don’t even own. Greed for attention, amirite?

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So, I grab a coffee instead. I stroll down the beautiful Laan van de Kruideniers. It’s a nice street, trees everywhere, but I’m still mad about that appeltaart. I mean, come on! Who does that? Anyway, I’m sipping my coffee, trying to chill, when I bump into my buddy, Jeroen. He’s all hyped about this new bike path they’re building near the Veluwemeer. Apparently, it’s gonna be epic for cycling. I’m like, “Dude, I can’t even think about biking right now. I’m still bitter about that pie!”

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