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So, picture this: me, green lil’ me, cruisin’ some dusty road. “Where’s the body?”—nah, scratch that, “Where’s the gal?” I’d be all nervous, ribbitin’ to myself, “Kermit, don’t screw this up!” Prolly spot her leanin’ on a lamppost, smokin’, lookin’ bored as heck. I’d roll up, all polite—Hi-ho, miss!—and she’d smirk, like, “What’s a frog want?” Ha! I’d die laughin’ inside.

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After the parade, I head back to the café. It’s packed again! I’m like, “What is happening?!” I’m back in promoter mode, chatting, laughing, and handing out more flyers. I’m on fire!

Gossip show host Dennis Schouten stabbed in Enschede bar