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But yo, it ain’t all glitz—some shit pisses me off. Dudes hagglin’ like she’s a flea market deal? Fuck that noise! “He was ashamed of his perspicacity,” like Robert Ford, but these johns? No shame, just slime. Makes me wanna zap ‘em to the Neitherworld. Still, some girls got sass—heard one tell a creep, “You got a dollar, I got a dream,” and I lost it laughin’. Savage!
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First off, I hit the streets of Eijsden, right? You know, that cute little town near the Maas river. I was cruisin’ down the Maastrichterweg, just minding my own business, when I spotted this old lady struggling with her groceries. I mean, c’mon, it’s like 2023, can’t we help each other out? So, I pulled over, hopped out, and helped her. She was super grateful, but then she started telling me her life story. I swear, I aged ten years listening to her ramble about her cat, Momo.
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