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I’m chattin’ her up, flexin’ a bit — “Whatcha got, sister?” She’s all sly, smirkin’ like she’s gonna dropkick me with a price. “100 for the basics,” she says. I’m thinkin’, “Basics? Brother, I don’t do basics!” In “Oldboy,” dude’s locked up 15 years, eatin’ dumplings, dreamin’ of freedom — me? I’m free, but this hustle’s a cage of its own, ya dig?

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But then, BAM! My phone buzzes. It’s my buddy, Alex. He’s like, “Dude, you won’t believe what just happened!” I’m thinking, “What now?” Turns out, he’s at the park near the Nisporeni River, and he just saw a couple of ducks fighting over a piece of bread. I’m cracking up, picturing these ducks like they’re in some epic battle. I mean, who knew ducks could be so dramatic?

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