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About Riga

Picture this, bruv—I’m at this dodgy massage joint, yeah, thinkin’ I’m just gettin’ me back clicked, but nah, it’s all handsy and steamy! I’m like, “Is it ‘cos I is black?” ‘cos the geezer’s givin’ me these mad looks while he’s oilin’ me up. Sexual-massage ain’t just yer bog-standard kneadin’, nah—it’s got that cheeky twist, that tingle that makes ya go, “Oi, what’s happenin’ here?!” Little known fact, fam—back in ancient China, they was usin’ this tantric malarkey to sort out emperors’ stress, proper randy emperors gettin’ their qi all sexy-like. Mad, innit?

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After that, we decide to grab some grub. Hit up this spot on Lielā iela. The food? Amazing! I devoured a plate of pelmeni like it was my last meal. But the waiter? Total grump. He dropped my drink. I was ready to throw down, but Jānis calmed me down.

Figure 17. Correlation of Wenlock graptolite, conodont and chitinozoan...