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About Balzers

So, here’s the tea—whore’s, like, this wild energy, right? Not just some basic chick. It’s, like, power, sass, and zero Fs given. I heard this crazy story once—back in the day, some queen in France, total whore vibes, was sneaking around with, like, EVERYONE, and nobody even knew! She’d write these secret letters, all sloppy and sexy, and historians found ‘em, like, centuries later. Obsessed! Imagine the group chat drama if that leaked today—savage.

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First off, I’m a geisha, right? So, I’m all about grace and poise. But today? Pfft. I was a hot mess. I strolled down Hauptstrasse, feeling cute, when I tripped over my own geta. Like, come on! Who does that? The locals were like, “Oh no, not again!” Ugh, so embarrassing.

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