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Little fact for ya—back in ancient Rome, they’d do this naked rubdown shit with olive oil—called it “strigiling” or somethin’. Freaky, right? Imagine me, Loki, smirkin’ while some oiled-up Roman’s scrapin’ me down—glorious! Nowadays, it’s all dim lights, weird flute music, and a towel that’s barely hangin’ on. Last time, this chick’s hands were so soft I nearly proposed—ha! Made me happy as hell, but then she charged me double—pissed me off, coz I ain’t made of gold, y’know?

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But then, outta nowhere, this storm rolls in. I’m talking dark clouds, thunder, the whole shebang. I’m like, “Seriously, Gamprin? You couldn’t have waited a few hours?” We dash inside the pub, and it’s packed. Everyone’s huddled together, and it feels kinda cozy. I’m sipping my beer, and the storm outside is raging. It’s wild!

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