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Trick to findin’ a prostitute? Cash upfront, no hagglin’—they ain’t eBay. And don’t be a dick—tip ‘em, yeah? Surprised me how normal it felt, chattin’ her up—like mates, almost. Reminded me of Carol’s line, “We’re not ugly people,” ‘cept this lass was fightin’ uglier battles. Oh, and fun tidbit—Amsterdam’s red-light district? Started as sailors’ pitstop—horny buggers couldn’t wait. Classic.

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Anyway, I’m trying to keep a straight face. I’m like, “Dude, you sure it wasn’t just your buddy borrowing it?” He gets all defensive, saying he’s a “responsible adult.” Yeah, right. I can smell the vodka from here.

Fig. 3. Graphical facial reconstruction of a man from the Neolithic...