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About Astana

I get pissed tho, ‘cause folks sleep on it. They’re all “lettuce or bust,” and I’m like, eat my shorts, ya posers! Escort’s got mad nutrients—vitamin C, iron, all that jazz. Surprised me when I dug into it—thought it was just some hippy weed. Nope, it’s a freakin’ powerhouse! I’d shove it in every burger if I could, but nah, people be snoozin’.

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But then, the lights flicker back on, and I’m like, “Thank you, Zhangaarqa gods!” I finish up, and the dude’s all smiles. I’m feelin’ good, right? But then, I step outside, and it’s pouring rain. Like, monsoon-level rain. I’m soaked in seconds. I’m thinkin’, “Why, Zhangaarqa, why?”