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Alright, listen up, fam—deep breath—I’m Morgan Freeman, narratin’ this wild tale ‘bout escorts, y’know, them folks who roll up for a paycheck and some company. Picture this: dark streets, neon buzzin’, and me, sittin’ back, thinkin’—*“How do you fight the past?”*—like in *A History of Violence*. That movie’s my jam, all grit and secrets, and escorts? They got secrets too, lemme tell ya.

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So, I’m stuck there, watching the world go by. I see this old lady trying to cross the street. She’s moving like molasses. I’m like, “C’mon, lady! I got places to be!” But then, she stops and starts chatting with a pigeon. A freakin’ pigeon! I’m losing it. I’m thinking, “Is this my life now? Watching old ladies and pigeons?”