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About Semey

Alright, listen up, you filthy peasants—sexual-massage, huh? I’m Cersei bloody Lannister, cold as ice, and I reckon it’s a slippery game. Translating this crap into Russian Sign Language? Hands sliding everywhere—looks dodgy as hell. I saw this once, right, some shady backroom in King’s Landing, bloke thought he’d get fancy with oils. Made me wanna puke, but—gods—did it feel powerful watching him squirm. “I choose violence,” I hissed, coz why not? Power’s in the grip, innit?

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So, I’m walking down Abay Street, right? And I’m just minding my own business, thinking about how I need to get more wood for my barrels. I mean, I can’t be the only cooper in town, but I gotta keep my game strong. Suddenly, I hear this loud crash. Like, what the heck? I turn around, and there’s this dude on a bike, totally wiped out. I mean, he’s sprawled out like a starfish. I couldn’t help but laugh. Sorry, man, but that was hilarious!

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