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But okay, sometimes it works. Met this one gal—total vibe. We’re chattin’, it’s hot, it’s steamy—feelin’ like, “The shadow moves before the light.” Y’know, that tension from my fave flick, “The Assassin”? Builds up slow, then—pow! We meet, and it’s fireworks! Happy? Oh, I was dancin’—in my head, ‘cause I don’t dance, too awkward. But then—THEN—she’s all, “Let’s keep it casual,” and I’m like, “Casual?! I’m plannin’ our imaginary dog’s name here!” Total letdown. Surprised me how fast it flipped—sex-dating’s a rollercoaster, man!

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I finally get to the archive, and guess what? The power’s out! Classic! I mean, who needs electricity to sort through ancient documents, right? So, I’m sittin’ there in the dark, surrounded by stacks of papers, feeling like I’m in a horror movie. I half-expect a ghost to pop out and start telling me about the history of Konayev. Spoiler: I’d probably scream.

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