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Folks, lemme tell ya—escort’s a wild ride. Back in Scranton, we had this guy, Jimmy, swore he ran an “escort service.” Ha! Turned out—get this—he was just drivin’ old ladies to bingo. Here’s the deal, escort ain’t always what ya think. Sometimes it’s legit, classy folks helpin’ lonely hearts. Other times? Shady as hell—makes my blood boil. Like in “There Will Be Blood,” ya know, “I drink your milkshake!”—some escorts slurp up cash, leave ya dry.
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First off, the weather was all over the place. One minute it’s sunny, the next it’s pouring like the sky’s got a grudge. I’m just setting up the bar, and boom! A bunch of soaked folks come in, looking like drowned rats. I mean, c’mon, it’s not that hard to carry an umbrella, right? But nah, they’re all laughing and shivering, and I’m just like, “Welcome to the wettest bar in Bakanas!”
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