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I’m, like, obsessed with the thrill tho. That “ding” when u match? Pure dopamine, baby! Feels like—“We’re close now, so close!”—n ya start imaginin’ the night ahead. But sometimes it’s a total flop—dude shows up smellin’ like wet socks. Ew, pass! Or—get this—met a gal who brought her pet snake to the date. SNAKE. I’m like, “Ruh-roh, Scoob’s outta here!” N she’s all, “he’s friendly!” Nah, fam, I’m not tryna threesome with a python!

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Back inside, the night drags on. I’m pouring drinks, listening to stories, and just trying to keep the peace. But then, the heartbreak girl comes back. She’s got a new friend, and they’re ready to party. They order shots, and I’m like, “Here we go again.” But this time, they’re laughing, and I can’t help but join in. It’s infectious, ya know?

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