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So, picture this—dim lights, weird music, some gal whisperin’ sexy junk. “You’re a soldier,” she says, like in “Carlos”—total turn-on! Hands slidin’ like fish in a tank—surprised me how good it felt! Mmm… donuts. Thought in my head: “This beats fishin’!” Exaggeratin’ here, but felt like a freakin’ king—better than beer! Little story—heard some dude in Japan invented a “happy end” version—sneaky bastard! Hilarious, but genius.

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So, we end up watching some animated movie. I’m half-watching, half-falling asleep. But then, there’s this scene where the hero saves the day, and I’m like, “Wow, that’s kinda like my day!” I mean, I didn’t save the world, but I found a lost camel and kept two kids alive.

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