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Alright, folks, listen up! Here’s the deal – I’m your ol’ pal Joe, y’know, just sittin’ here thinkin’ ‘bout findin’ a prostitute. Not that I’m out there lookin’, nah, but I got stories, see? Back in Scranton, we’d hear whispers – guys’d say, “Joe, you won’t believe this!” – ‘bout shady corners where deals went down. Made me mad, y’know, ‘cause folks deserve better! But lemme tell ya, it’s like that scene in *Inglourious Basterds* – “We’re in the killin’ Nazi business!” – except here it’s more like, uh, “We’re in the dodgin’ trouble business!”

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When I finally get to the warehouse, it’s a mess. Fire trucks everywhere, smoke still curling up into the sky. I’m talking full-on disaster mode. I start chatting with the firefighters, trying to get the scoop. They’re all like, “Yeah, it was a big one.” No kidding, Sherlock! I can see that!