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Oi, mate, it’s Tyrion Lannister here—I drink and I know things, yeah? So, sexual-massage—bloody hell, where do I start? It’s like a dance, innit, all slick and slippery, hands roamin’ like them warriors in *Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon*. “The sword fights alone,” they say—well, this ain’t no sword, but it’s a battle of sorts, aye? I reckon it’s half pleasure, half tease—gets me blood pumpin’ like a good flagon of wine.

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After that, I had to deal with this client. Let’s call him Mr. Grumpy. He comes in, and he’s all like, “Why are my taxes so high?” I’m like, “Uh, maybe because you bought that fancy car on Cheonggyecheon-ro?” Seriously, dude, you can’t just splurge and expect the taxman to be nice.

Buan, where centuries-old Buddhist culture meets Korea's quaint nature