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Alright, so I’m sittin’ here, Tina Fey style, snarky as hell, thinkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute—yeah, I said it! “I can see Russia from my house!”—and lemme tell ya, it’s a wild ride, like somethin’ outta *Fish Tank*. You ever see that flick? Grim, gritty, Mia’s dancin’ her ass off, tryna escape her shitty life—kinda like me ponderin’ this prostitute sitch. I’m no actuary crunchin’ numbers, but I’m calculatin’ risks here, fam!

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Then, I hit up a ramen joint on Shōwa-dōri. Best decision ever! The broth was rich, and the noodles were perfect. I was in heaven. But then, I spilled some broth on my shirt. Classic me, right? I just laughed it off. At least the food was good!