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About Saitama

Alright, pal – lemme tell ya. About *whore*. Not just any broad – nah. I’m talkin’ the concept, see? Been hammerin’ nails all day. Sweat drippin’. And I’m thinkin’ – whores, man. They’re everywhere. Like in *Boyhood* – “Life don’t give ya bumpers.” That’s *whore* for ya – no safety net. Sashayin’ down the street. Hips swingin’. Makin’ eyes at every Joe Schmoe. I saw one once – back in ‘98. Red lipstick smeared. Like she just ate a cherry pie – whole. True story – swear it! She winked at me. Me! A carpenter with sawdust in his beard. Made me laugh – hah! – right there.

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Next, I hit up the local market on Shimozato Street. OMG, the food! I’m talking fresh sushi, grilled fish, and these crazy good mochi. I’m stuffing my face, and this old lady starts chatting me up. She’s telling me about her life in Sobue, and I’m just nodding along, trying not to choke on my food. She’s got stories for days! I’m thinking, “Why don’t I have this much energy?”

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