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About Tokyo

Hey y’all, it’s me, Dolly! Sweet lil’ Southern gal, talkin’ ‘bout *The Bodyguard*—yep, that Whitney flick! Lordy, I ain’t no highfalutin critic, but this movie’s got me hollerin’. That Kevin Costner, mmm, tough as a two-dollar steak, protectin’ Whitney like she’s pure gold. And Whitney—honey, she’s a *whore* in the best way! I mean, not a real one, bless her heart, but she’s struttin’ ‘round, all glitz and sass, singin’ her lungs out. Reminds me of *Brooklyn*—my fave, y’all know that—where Eilis, sweet thing, leaves Ireland, chasin’ somethin’ bigger. Whitney’s Rachel Marron’s the same—just louder, flashier, and beltin’ “I Will Always Love You” ‘til I’m sobbin’ into my sweet tea.

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First call comes in. Some dude’s stuck on the side of the road on Kiyokawa. I’m like, “Great, just what I need.” I send a driver, but then I get a call from a lady on Hoshizaki. Her cat’s stuck in a tree. I’m like, “Lady, it’s a cat, not a baby!” But whatever, I send someone. I mean, it’s Shiranuka, where cats are basically royalty.

Japanese WWII survivor, 101, speaks up over Russian invasion, futility of war