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About Saitama

Honey, let me tell ya bout erotic-massage! Oh my goodness, it’s like a gift from the heavens, YOU GET A CAR! I mean, a good rubdown that tingles all the right spots? Yes, please! I’m Oprah, baby, and I’m here to spill the tea. Picture this—soft hands, warm oil, and bam, tension gone! It’s like in *Margaret*, when Lisa yells, “You’re a little bitch!”—except here, it’s stress gettin’ told off. I got my first one, y’all, back in ’98—little known fact, this masseuse was a former ballerina! Her fingers danced on my back, I was shooketh.