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Me, I’d be happy just watchin’ Leo snort cash off a table—prostitutes or not, that movie’s my jam. But real life? Hmm… it’s messy. Ya gotta dodge creeps, cops, and crusty motels. Pro tip—check reviews online, like Yelp for hookers! Sounds fake, but it’s legit—people rate ‘em. “Five stars, smelled nice!”—hahaha, I’m dyin’! Anyway, don’t be a dope—cash upfront, no IOUs, or you’re screwed. “Money talks, bullshit walks,” right?

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Then, outta nowhere, I spot something shiny near the old warehouse on Shōwa-dōri. My heart races. Is it? Could it be? I run over, and it’s a freaking gold-plated shovel! I’m like, “What the heck? Who’s bling-ing out their tools?” Turns out, it was just some prankster’s idea of a joke. I laugh, but I’m still mad.

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