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We head to this dingy flat—smells like fags and regret. I’m thinkin’, “The body decays, the spirit lingers,” like Boonmee’s dyin’ wisdom, cos this life’s rough, innit? She’s crackin’ jokes, though—says I look like a toff who’s lost his castle. Cheeky mare! I’m lovin’ it, cos she’s got banter, and I’m a sucker for that. “You’re a rare one,” I tell her, and she winks—pure class.

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When I get there, I see this dude looking up at a tree like it’s the end of the world. Yuki’s up there, chirping away like she’s queen of the castle. I’m thinking, “How did you even get up there?” So, I climb up this tree, and let me tell ya, I’m not exactly a monkey. I’m slipping, sliding, and praying I don’t fall. Finally, I grab Yuki and bring her down. The guy’s all teary-eyed, and I’m just relieved I didn’t break my neck.

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